Heathens Highway

Sometimes I make porn and stuff. Sometimes I just ramble.

Success is…

12 February 2011 by dwb

When dudes are uploading tube videos of themselves beating off to your videos, you can pat yourself on the back and bask in the sweet warm glow of success.

I’m not going to watch this guy rub one off to find out, but if any of you do and he shoots his load on his screen, please post a comment here about it. It would bring Kincade great joy to know his face was covered in man juice.

Leave a comment | Categories: Keepin It Real, Porno, Pure Awesomeness, The Internetz | Tags:

AVN vs Thailand

04 May 2007 by dwb

After reading review after review on AVN regarding movies shot in Thailand, one thing I noticed was a common thread among them all. Regardless of the reviewer, regardless of if it was a good or bad movie, regardless of how many A’s they gave it, regardless of the director or company, almost every single one of them felt compelled to make a comment about the Thai girls being prostitutes. They just had to throw in that they were working girls, or it was just another days work for them.

Well, there is one exception and it was Hustler, time and time again. Not a single word was written about the Thai girls Hustler has shot in Thailand. It’s not really shocking as Hustler drops quite a but of cashola into AVN for ads. However, Hustler’s Asian Fever movies, shot in Thailand (with the exception of the last one which was pretty damn good), are among the worst movies to ever come out of Asia. I have actually fallen asleep watching Asian Fever and they are totally impossible to masturbate to. I’m a fan of many of the Hustler lines, just not what they shoot in Thailand. However, this is not a “pick on Hustler” post so I will get back to the issue at hand, AVN vs Thailand.

So why do they take their stabs at the Thai girls in every movie except Hustler’s movies?

Well, besides the fact that the girls are all hookers, you have to stop and wonder why the wouldn’t just say they are amateur or first time girls. After all, that is what they say about white girls, Latin girls and black girls if it was shot in LA, South America or Europe.

And what about the models in LA, Europe or South America who make porn and are also prostitutes? Many of them escort and sell their pussy off camera, yet they are “stars,” “models,” “actresses,” and “talent.” And lets not forget that EVERY girl who ever stepped in front of a lens, in any country, did fact get paid for her services. So why are the Thai girls getting singled out? Make no mistake about it, a large majority of the girls in the porn industry are in fact hookers, so what’s the difference?

But don’t take my word for it, here are some quotes I pulled off the reviews:

Black Thai Affair
Reviewed by: Mike Albo
Review: “The girls are all of the Thai hooker variety: not too toned, not too enthusiastic and not all that clean looking.”

Asian Insemination
Reviewed by Bradley Milton
Review: “Truthfully, it wouldn’t be too far off the mark to suggest that Pornero’s performers are hookers.”

Fresh Thai Cream Pies 2
Reviewed by Darklady
Review: “If the women portrayed here are any kind of representative sample, pierced tongues and eyebrows are all the rage among Thailand’s Pattaya bar girls. This surprisingly and sometimes almost disturbingly arousing release introduces five young working girls who take their job seriously. Retailing: More an attraction for admirers of Thai sex workers, with the cream pies as a kind of bonus.”

Bangkok Suckee Fuckee
Reviewed by Bradley Milton
Review: “The sex is pretty good, but it sometimes appears as if the girls are street pros servicing this crazy Yank with a video camera.”

Bangkok Suckee Fuckee 4
Reviewed by Darklady
Review: “When shopping for a porn friendly Thai prostitute, there’s no knowing what to expect until show time. Retailing: For those seeking a grittier, sex-for-sale experience.”

Black Cock in Bangkok
Reviewed by Nelson X
Review: “Although it’s obvious the Thai girls in this release aren’t strangers to the concept of money for sex, they do appear to be genuinely timid about doing it for the cameras.”

Teeny Thais 2
Reviewed by Marc Star
Review: “The footage in Teeny Thais 2 may have been imported from Thailand, or these girls are either first or second-generation immigrants. Either way, they’re authentic Thai girls – some of who have the detached interest of Thai street hookers.”

Babes in Thailand 3somes
Reviewed by Guy Norhinf
Review: “With one of the more basic, simple titles in recent porn history, Babes in Thailand 3somes shows off 10 regional cuties in prostitute-style hotel-room sex.”

Asian Street Hookers 43
Reviewed by Nick Strauss
Review: “With the exception of Jade, all the girls in the title might actually be Thai street hookers, which isn’t much of a selling point either. The entire production has that taint of an illegal and unregulated sex industry that our adult entertainment biz strives to steer clear of.”

Asia Bootleg 4
Reviewed by Marc Star
Review: “These girls are pros. In fact, they may be too pro, because they just don’t seem to get any pleasure out of having sex. Decent enough considering it’s just another day’s work for these girls.”

Of course there are more, but I lost interest after looking at all of these ridiculous comments.

Did someone in charge at AVN get a bad case of the drippy dick while on a sexcapade in Bangkok? Or did he wake up after a night of drunken debauchery only to find out that his girl can piss standing up and that he in fact had been fucking Ladyboy ass all night?

If anyone has the answer to why AVN has a hard on for Thai whores, I’m all ears. Otherwise I’m going to place my money on a drippy dick / Ladyboy combo.

Oh, and a personal note to the AVN reviewers… you suck. Seriously.

Leave a comment | Categories: Adult Industry, Keepin It Real, Thailand | Tags: , ,

Why God, why?

26 March 2007 by dwb

I have been trying to shoot very little in Thailand these days, but when I do, I like to shoot 1 or 2 movies to pay for my travel expenses. Usually about 5 minutes into the first shoot I find myself thinking, “Why are you doing this? Why are you wasting your time with this bubble gum porn?” Then by the end of the shoot I confirm with myself that it really is not worth the money.

For starters, Thai people are just not sexual. Yea, they will blow darts out of their ass on stage for all to see, but off stage they are generally shy and not really into porn. And yea, they know how to dress like whores, but most of them have no clue what “sexy” really means, even after Justin Timberlake recently brought it back. And yea, there are more prostitutes here selling ass than probably anywhere else on earth, but that doesn’t mean they want to make porn or are any good at it.

They often look the opposite of where you ask them to look, cum without warning, complain they hurt, show up late, leave early, lie about everything and try to pass off bogus IDs on you, and then steal something on the way out the door just for the sake of stealing. And I pay them to do this.

This trip started as a vacation with my brother and turned into another trip from hell. Due to the restrictions on my award ticket, I was not able to go home to care of the problem in my living room. You remember, the one were my ceiling collapsed and it rained in my living room for two weeks while the house sat empty. It still sits a mess, mildewing as I type this.

Luckily my good friend here let me use his gear to shoot a couple of movies to offset my costs. The least I can do for his generosity is give him a link to his site, so please visit OnProbation.com.

Mr. Kincade cashed in some miles to come over for 10 days to help me work. His second day here, he pinched a nerve in his back and is just now getting back on his feet, but he’s still in a lot of pain.

Then I saw this God awful mess.

This once again made me question it all. Here is a tranny who does not care enough about herself to get this taken care of. This is quite possibly the worst case of “something” I have ever seen.

Of course she did not even tell me about this and let me get through 75 photos before I went down for that tranny under shot to see her balls, then SURPRISE!

This dumb cunt actually thought she could do a wack-off scene for me and it would not be noticed.

Out of the goodness of my tiny Grinch heart, I paid her 2000 baht to go to the doctor, but we both knew she was going to by yaabaa (drugs) with it and it would be smoked before the sun would rise.

How could you have this on your nuts and NOT be taking care of it? I mean, look at this shit, you know it hurts, but she is still out selling her asshole every night. Unreal.

It’s very difficult to get motivated to work with people who show up with shit like this on their body and try to lie to you about it, then steal your deodorant on the way out the door.

Amazing Thailand.

Leave a comment | Categories: Keepin It Real, Porno, Shemales, Thailand, Thinking Out Loud | Tags: , , , , , ,

When ladyboys call…

24 March 2007 by dwb

At 7:04am my phone rang just about the time where I was nodding off to sleep. It was Thailand’s infamous ladyboy Amy Amour.

Me: This had better be good or someone better be dead, it’s 7am.

Amy: Mr. Dee, what do you do now?

Me: Sleep!!!

Amy: Ok, good. You can come to take my photo now?

Me: You smoking yaabaa?

Amy: No Mr Dee, why you ting-tong so much? I no sa-moke yaabaa.

Me: Mmm hmmm.

Amy: So you take my photo or not? Today I have good heart and I give you for free.

Me: Where do you want to meet?

Amy: The gay beach in Jomtien.

Me: Hmmmm. OK, See you in 30 minutes. You better be there.

I hang up the phone and grab my travel camera. I have this nice Canon Powershot that can take some really nice shots and it’s small and easy to travel with so I take it everywhere with me. So out the door I went.

We met at the “gay beach” (Dongtan Beach) as the sun hit about 200 degrees. I shot a handful of photos of her, and it wasn’t long before she had to squint so I called it a wrap. I explained to her that it would be est if she called me next time BEFORE the sun came up so we can work while it’s cool and the sun is giving off that warm morning glow.

What happened next is still a bit of a blur, but we ended up at a water park. No, a real water park, she did not piss on me, nor I her. A Thai water park is much like the water parks around the rest of the world except they don’t care about the safety of their customers. You can ride the speed slides with people on your back, which we did and she rode me like a surf board. You can attempt to stand up as you fly down the super slide, which we did not do but plenty of the Thai boys did and busted their ass along the way.

Face first, ass first, upside down, and with a topless ladyboy on your back… all is fair game in the land of smiles and chlorine filled water.

Lat me back up a minute and tell you that I last about 5 minutes at this place before injury #1 occurred. She ushered me up to the largest speed slide and demanded that I went first. “You da man, you go first!” I told her. She found that amusing, but pushed me along and somehow I ended up sitting at the top of this shoot looking down into the shallow waters below, where I would soon end up. The thing that worried me the most, besides my size and weight, is that everyone in the water below was only waist deep.

Somehow, I am supposed to come down this slide into waist deep water and not end up a cripple. I’ve done much worse and dangerous things in my life, so off I went.

About 5 seconds into this slide I was struck my fear. I was going waaaaay too fast. The water is going to be too shallow for my fat ass and I’m going to get hurt, there is no question about it. The logical thing to do was to stick my hands to the edges of the fiberglass slide and try to slow myself down.

Dumb idea.

What I actually did was seriously burn, as in major friction burn, 6 of my 10 fingers. This did not actually slow me down but I was going so fast I did not feel the burn at the time.

I hit the water and to my surprise skipped across it and walked out of the pool, at which time my fingers felt like they were being mashed onto a grill. I sucked it up because I did not want to look like a tourist pussy, and headed back up to go one a much smaller and curvy slide where I was to become a human surf board for a transsexual and two small Russian boys who were also allowed, not by me, to mount my body just before I shoved off.

I’m sure it was quite a site. Me, the chunky American, a small transsexual, and two Russian kids about 10 years old each, were speeding down this slide screaming like little girls. For a moment, it was fun. However, the fun didn’t last long and after a few more body surfing trips, I got a wild hair up my ass to go face first, superman style, down the biggest speed slide.

I don’t know exactly how fast I was going but it had to be near the speed of light. I think the shove off is what made it worse because when I hit the first “hump,” I caught air and traveled about 10 feet in the air before having the wind knocked out of my body as I hit, only to pick up more speed. At this stage, it would be normal to shit your pants, but as I found out, humans are unable to shit themselves while traveling the speed of light. Who knew?

What happened next is a little fuzzy, but I do remember hitting the water so fast and going under water. My trunks started to pull off my body because of the speed in which I hit the water. I could feel them slipping off as I was darting underwater and with my hands, I reached out like Christopher Reeves in his finest Hollywood hour.

At this point I could have let them slip off as I’m sure it was not the first time this has happened coming off of this bullet side, and for certain it would not be the first time my pants had fallen off somewhere foreign.

I don’t know where in my mind I thought I could just hunch over and pull up my shorts, but when I made even the slightest tilt of my head, I shot straight down and smashed my head in the shallow water while traveling at a speed that should have killed me or at least broke my neck, in true Superman style. It felt like someone hit me in the head with a large hammer, then I blacked out for a few seconds and came to on my back floating in the water.

My head was spinning, and I didn’t realize how hurt I was, but the little persistent tranny got me up for one more surf ride before I drove her on my moped to her friends house (another hot ladyboy) where they played with Barbie Dolls and made me watch the Victoria Secret DVD while they acted it out. It was a strange afternoon.

After chilling out for a while I knew I needed to have my head looked at as the throbbing was becoming more intense. I knew this feeling well from years of skateboarding as a kid and falling on my head. I spent the next couple hours at the Bangkok-Pattaya Hospital where they checked me out and around 1pm, they confirmed my thoughts of a mild concussion.

It had been a glorious morning but it did not come without injury to my fingers, neck, head, left shoulder, left ear and skin. Oh yea, I think I forgot to mention that my head and face are burnt to a crisp.

If there is a moral to this story, I think it has something to do about not answering your phone at 7am when you are called out of the blue, by a ladyboy.

Hell is…

Leave a comment | Categories: Hell Is:, Keepin It Real, Shemales, Thailand | Tags: , , ,

Jelena Jensen & My Prayer

10 March 2007 by dwb

Dear Lord,
I know I’m a nasty son of a bitch. And yea, I know I do some bad, despicable things and throw my cock around into places it doesn’t belong.

I am a fornicator Lord. A fornicator and a sinner.

But, I’m on my knees today Lord… I’m on my knees begging you to grant me one wish. One wish and I will end my evil ways. Please dear Lord, grant my wish and make Jelena Jensen get a wild hair up her ass to e-mail me and ask for me to father her child. I need to breed this woman.

That’s all I ask.

Jelena Jensen was gracious enough to read my blog and send me this sign. You and I both know her tits are to die for and her body was built to breed, so dear Lord, why deny me, your humble servant, the right to breed that body?

In Jesus’ name,

* Jelena is amazing, and if you want to see more of her… Click Here to visit her site.

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Cutting off big black tranny dicks

02 March 2007 by dwb

I think I blacked this one out, but it just creeped back into my brain for some reason, and I’m going to share it with you.

So… I met a black transsexual while I was picking up a black girl that I was about to shoot for a scene. I have no clue how the topic turned to this but we started talking about sex change operations and she, the tranny, told me how there was a guy in “Over The Rhine” (the Cincinnati ghetto) that did full sex change operations IN HIS APARTMENT!!!!

Yes, you read that right. Some loon was chopping off inner city tranny cocks IN HIS APARTMENT, and the trannys were lined up to have it done!!!

You know what… this is so heinous I don’t even want to continue this post. I’m remembering the conversation I had with that poor tranny who was going to have her cock chopped at this crazy dudes house and I’m getting all weird about it.

I’m out.

Leave a comment | Categories: And Now You Know, Memories, Shemales, What The Fuck | Tags: , , ,

Stoeng Meanchey

26 February 2007 by dwb

If you are ever passing through Cambodia, and trust me when I say there is no real reason you would, and you want to have your heart broken or play the good tourist and donate to some great organizations, look no further than this Hell hole.

Stoeng Meanchey is on the outskirts of Phenom Penh and hundreds, if not thousands of people, many of them children, sift through the garbage here all day to scavenge enough to maybe make $1 USD.

I spent the day here shooting pics and I can tell you first hand that the smell and almost unbearable. The gasses in the air, the smoke from the flames and the dust floating in the air made it almost impossible to breath. I can only imagine the damage that is being caused to their health while working here.

There are several orphanages in the area that will take this children in, educate them, give them health care and keep them out of this garbage pit. It only cost a few hundred bucks a year per child if you want to help, so if you want to do your part, do some research and help one of these kids or go there and see it for yourself. It will change your life if you do.

Here are a few snaps I took that day:

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Eating tarantulas

25 February 2007 by dwb

I have been on a long needed mini-vacation, but reality struck me hard on my first day back on the grind when I rolled into Thailand to find that several of my DVDs are being bootlegged on the streets. :-( God damn this place! As if it’s not difficult enough, now I have to explain to the girls why their movies are selling in their country, after I told them it never would.

Anyway… my little brother and I have been running around Asia checking out temples, beaches and whores for the past 2 weeks and have had a blast. He had his first 3 way and we both got sun burned after a full day boating around the Phi Phi Islands. Somehow we ended up in Cambodia and spent a few days eating “Happy Pizza” while running around like fools at Angkor Wat.

Good times.

So now I’m sitting in a room with a broken air-con and little piss ants crawling all over the table where I’m typing, and wondering if these little fuckers will ruin my laptop if they get inside of it, or will the heat of the laptop just cook them alive. Speaking of cooking alive, while we were out and about we munched on crocodile meat, silk worms and even a fried tarantula!!! Believe it or not the tarantula tasted pretty damn good, much like BBQ. Eating tarantula seems to be something normal of parts of South East Asia. Go figure.

Leave a comment | Categories: Cambodia, Keepin It Real, On The Road, Thailand | Tags: , , , , , ,

Monks, Life and Happy Pizza

24 February 2007 by dwb

Some of you may or may not know that I am fluent in Khmer. One of the days we were at Angkor, I ran into the old man you see about and shot the shit with him all day long.

What a wise old man he was. We talked about everything including where to find the “happy pizza” that we would eat the next day. He was a very cool monk.

I love taking photos here because the contrast of the Monk’s orange robes against the dark stone on the temples is amazing. We shot a ton of photos that day but I’m too lazy to load them all up, so here are two.

Oh… and I’m not really fluent in Khmer but he did speak enough English to direct us to the Happy Pizza.

That is another story.

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08 January 2007 by dwb

We learn something new every day, and what I just learned has been driving me crazy for 2 years. But now I know what it is.

Every since I started shooting Asian transsexuals I noticed many of them had a problem where their penis heads could not come outside of the foreskin. Many of them said it was painful when their cocks became hard, and by the looks of things, I believe them.

Well, it turns out they suffer from a medical condition called Phimosis.

This of course also gives the illusion of a limp cock if you are not able to see the head of the penis.

I kept getting mails from my distributor telling me they needed photos of ladyboys with hard cocks, and I was sending them photos with hard cocks. It was very frustrating to say the least, but now I know I have Wikipedia to back me up.

Click Here to see what Wikipedia has to say about Phimosis.

Leave a comment | Categories: And Now You Know, Shemales, Thailand | Tags: , ,

Pale Blue Dot

03 January 2007 by dwb

“We succeeded in taking that picture [from deep space], and, if you look at it, you see a dot. That’s here. That’s home. That’s us.

On it, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever lived, lived out their lives. The aggregate of all our joys and sufferings, thousands of confident religions, ideologies and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilizations, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every hopeful child, every mother and father, every inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every superstar, every supreme leader, every saint and sinner in the history of our species, lived there on a mote of dust, suspended in a sunbeam.

The earth is a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena. Think of the rivers of blood spilled by all those generals and emperors so that in glory and in triumph they could become the momentary masters of a fraction of a dot. Think of the endless cruelties visited by the inhabitants of one corner of the dot on scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner of the dot. How frequent their misunderstandings, how eager they are to kill one another, how fervent their hatreds.

Our posturings, our imagined self-importance, the delusion that we have some privileged position in the universe, are challenged by this point of pale light. Our planet is a lonely speck in the great enveloping cosmic dark. In our obscurity — in all this vastness — there is no hint that help will come from elsewhere to save us from ourselves.

The Earth is the only world know so far to harbor life. There is nowhere else, at least in the near future, to which our species could migrate. Visit, yes. Settle, not yet. Like it or not, for the moment the Earth is where we make our stand.

It is up to us. It’s been said that astronomy is a humbling, and I might add, a character-building experience. To my mind, there is perhaps no better demonstration of the folly of human conceits than this distant image of our tiny world. To me, it underscores our responsibility to deal more kindly and compassionately with one another and to preserve and cherish that pale blue dot, the only home we’ve ever known.”

– Carl Sagan, Pale Blue Dot, 1994

(This post is for the power trippin’ customer service agents at Sprint. Other than the fact you currently control the destiny of my phone, you are nothing.)

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Long Keck Karen Tribe

02 January 2007 by dwb

I took these photos last year with my friend Bin while we traveled up north around the Thai / Burmese border.

This tribe was incredible to see, but sad at the same time. Everyone thinks the rings around their neck stretches their neck, and if they are removed, they will die. That is not true. The rings are quite heavy and they compress their collar bones, giving the illusion of a stretched neck. You’ll see a handful of the women without them. Removing them will not kill them.

So does anyone know of any long neck brothels in Burma? Sorry, I mean Myanmar. I do, and I’m not sharing.

And what’s with these countries changing their names? Burma & Siam are bad ass names. Myanmar & Thailand are average at best. I have no idea who changed them or why, but for now, lets blame Bush.

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2007 Words of wisdom

01 January 2007 by dwb

Happy 2007 everyone!

The sign posted above is a real sign but they forgot the most important bit of information. In addition to not allowing the Ladyboys upstairs, they forgot to add: “And whatever you do, don’t ever, for any amount of money, let them in the back door.

I would like to start 2007 with the following advice:

Don’t let the Ladyboys in your back door and you will have a wonderful and prosperous 2007.

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2006 – Year of the Heathen

31 December 2006 by dwb

2006 was the year of the Heathen.

In Asia it will soon be the turn of the new year. Not by their calendar, but by ours and it is the American way to say that’s all that matters.

I can honestly say that 2006 flashed by me in a blink of an eye, and a squirt of a cumshot.

We worked too much. I’m not sure exactly how much content we shot, but it was a lot. Many, many, many DVDs worth. For me, 2006 is one cum shot after another and one immigration line after another.

While I made a lot of money in 2006, I lost touch with a few friends along the way. It’s a shame how that works out.

With the help of a few good women, I made a couple of babies. Most of which never took their first breath. Not the first time I have been with a woman who had an abortion, but it still weighs on my soul sometimes. An ex-girlfriend of mine had an abortion and I went into the room with her during the process. The sound of the device while sucking out a child, the vacuum I assume they call it, was almost too much to deal with. She was crying, “you’re killing my baby.” It was heavy.

I’m getting off track.

With the help of my brother from another mother, I started a new business. It’s still in it’s infancy, but 2007 looks like it’s going to be a good year. I can’t wait to pay Uncle Sam more of my hard earned money. He and his wife are the only married couple I know who appear to be happy. Not good odds for those of you idiots who are getting married in 2007.

I caught Gonorrhea once. OK, twice. Those Asian strains are som bitches to get rid of as they have grown resistant to the standard meds used to clear up the drip. You learn something new every day don’t ya?

When I go back to the USA, I feel like a stranger now. I don’t know where anything is in my apartment anymore. I can’t find all the light switches in the dark. But the trade off to forgetting where your light switches are, is an incredible apartment in Thailand with an ocean view.

I spent time in Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, Philippines & Singapore. Fucked whores in all of them. That’s not my purpose for travel but it does help me waste the time after I’m done doing the tourist shit or adventure roaming. So I did get around in 2006, literally, and had to have 20 more pages added to my passport after getting refused departure in Cambodia for not having a single place for them to place an exit stamp. They refused to stamp the very back because it has an autograph of Kid-Rock on it.

During this miserable experience in Cambodia, I sent a text message to a friend of mine and got this reply: “cool. find a whore 2 fuck while you r there.”

Whore mongers to the end.

One night out drinking I lost a shoe and didn’t notice it until I was sobering up and it was long gone. That morning I held onto my bed and vomited out of control, minus a shoe, as the room twirled out of control. That was the last time I went drinking with Jscott and Dugmor.

I met some great new friends. Met some strange fuckers and a few people who I would rather not see again. I also grew a deep hatred for the incredibly rude middle eastern pricks who have invaded Thailand. I call Jihad on them and their hypocritical ways.

We were chased by the cops. I paid off some cops. Someone went to jail.

My baby brother got his Real Estate license while I was out of the country. That came by surprise and added to the reality check of me getting older. That check first came when he turned 30 this year. How does your little brother turn 30? Wow. But I’m very proud of him. Very proud.

My mom found a new boyfriend (she has been single for a while) and is in Love. I have never seen her so happy in my entire life. They even got tattoos like white trash hillbillies. He likes porn, smokes weed, and thinks I have the best job in the word. I’m happy for her and as long as she’s happy… that’s all that matters to me. Go mom! 2006 was a kick as year for her.

Kman tied the knot with a woman. I repeat, Kman tied the knot with a woman. I don’t think I need to go into detail on the magnitude of this for those of you who know him, but for those of you who don’t, it’s as close to Hell freezing over as they come. Speaking of… the above pic is how he gets down. Respect. Please note, there is only one female in that photo.

I wish I could say I did more this year, but it was mostly spent working, traveling or breaking international laws. However, if I had to sum up 2006 in a word… Whores.

So what will I do this year for new years? First I will tell you what I won’t do, and that is a repeat of what I did last year on new years. In fact, I spent it with the same guys that I lost my shoe with (Jscott & Dugmor) and spent it in a drunken stupor barebacking some chubby Thai hooker with ENORMOUS tits on the piss covered bathroom floor of a Go-Go Bar in Pattaya. < insert joke about the first case of 2006 Gonorrhea here > I can assure you I won’t be doing that again.

This year I will be sitting at home, in Kentucky, watching the world have fun on TV. It’s cold and wet. But to be honest, how can I top last year?

Happy New Years to all of you!!! I would tell you to be safe, but we both know there is no fun in that. Safety is for pansies and men named Shelia. Have unprotected sex with a stranger. Lose a shoe. Lose your pants. Get shit faced and drive home. Some of you just laughed, some just thought I was being irresponsible for saying that but we all know it’s reality and it’s going to happen.


Leave a comment | Categories: Keepin It Real, Memories, Sex, Shemales, Thailand, Thinking Out Loud, Whores | Tags: , , , ,

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