Sometimes I make porn and stuff. Sometimes I just ramble.
Seriously, what the fuck is going on here?
Does anyone know who made this or if there is more of it?
If porn at the airport is going to be seized, I’d love to be a fly on the wall when some weirdo comes through with an entire laptop full of crazy shit like this.
After having such a bad run of luck with the T-girls, we took a couple of days off and did some sight seeing. We wanted to get as far away from city people and chaos as possible, so after 5 military check-points and a few hours of driving, we were deep into the mountains in a sleepy mountain town that was freezing cold and drizzling rain. Cobble stone roads, small buildings and no white people. It was perfect.
We picked up some new threads today to blend in with the locals. Now we are so fly we can’t keep the mountain bitches off of us.
You just never know what your going to find walking along the streets in Colombia in the middle of the night.
This naked crack head was just walking around as if everything was normal. Though, looking back, perhaps everything was normal and we were the ones out of place. Now that I think about it, we should have shot this cracked out whore just for the sake of… shit, I dunno, for the sake of shooting something fucked up.
On second though, this was probably a very bad area for us to be roaming around in. We’re probably lucky we were not robbed, killed or kidnapped.
Coming soon to BlackVaginaFinder.com. WARNING – only click that link if you’re down to see some of the nastiest hoes ever captured on film.
As you sit in the comforts of your room, maybe even thinking about the homeless people or crack heads where you live, can you think of any reason why this nut job would not only be naked, but so fucking dirty on top of it? I bet she hasn’t worn clothes in months. How can you just walk the streets naked and dirty like this in any country? How do you just lay down naked on the street and go to sleep? Madness. Makes you wonder what’s going through her mind, if anything at all.
As we move to another city to track down a few guys who will bareback trannies in the ass, I find myself saying things that shock me as they leave my lips.
Let me share my top 10 favorites:
1. “I don’t have time to hang out in a strip club, I’m only here for the trannies. The women can wait.”
2. “No hookers for anyone until we find a pretty tranny with a working cock.”
3. “Do you want the tranny to cum in your ass or on your face?”
4. “Kincade, please don’t go and get drunk right now, I’m going to need your hard dick in a few hours.”
5. “Yes, I do think your pretty but I need to find some transsexuals first. Do you know any?”
6. “I swear I’m not gay or bi, its all for work. Honestly. Stop laughing. Hey, where are you going? I like girls. I love girls. OK… bye. I understand.”
7. “Sand, I need your hard cock over here right now. Rapido por favor!”
8. “Where are all the trannies? No? Donde esta la transvesties?”
9. (to hotel security) “Is it OK to bring girls to the room? Great… how about transsexuals? No? OK… bye.”
10. “I don’t ask for much. All I need is 10 shemales who can get hard and cum. Oh, and they have to be passable and be willing to take an HIV test and bareback on video.”
While picking up some “Postnior2” pills for a girl that Kincade shot his load in by mistake, we saw Caverject sitting there in the pharmacy fridge. It was cheap so we flipped for who was going to test it out. Of course Kincade lost and was the poor fucker to try out this erection shot. Truth be told, there was NO WAY I would of done this even if I would of lost the coin toss.
The fact that a perfectly good cock, and I don’t mean that in a gay way, is about to be injected with this stuff to make it even harder, boggles the mind. But hey, that’s how you gotta roll when you’re driving on Heathens Highway.
Ta-daa! Wood that could cut wood. Brilliant!
From what I’ve heard a lot of guys back in LA are using this shit to keep their cocks hard on the set. Why? If you ask me, if you NEED this to get wood, you don’t need to be in the business.
There is a new song by Sean Paul called “We Be Burnin’.”
This is our new theme song. Sand and Kincade are thanking their Gods for Zithromax right now.
My old man used to say, “Son, it’s all fun and games until you’re pissing razor blades.”
Muahahahahahaha!!!!!!
All is well on this beautiful night until this tool wants to toss a beer can out of the window of the taxi. I personally hate litter bugs and apparently so do the Colombian police because they pulled us over at 2am and we all pointed them right to Kincade. “He did it!”
They searched the entire car, looked at all my gear and even picked up the mini DV tapes of the days shoots but didn’t know what they were so they just cuffed Kincade as we laughed at him. I paid the cops $5 to let me take some pics, they were happy to ham it up for me.
Kincade spent a day in the can until we went through the SLOW process of bailing him out. It cost $250 total which is nothing compared to the horrible night he spent in a Colombian jail cell. Serves him right.
So Kincade, tell us what it’s like on the inside of a Colombian jail. LOL Next time aim for the litter can, ya jack ass.
As promised, here are some pics of Donkey Fucker #1. The O.G. of Donkey Fuckers. Coma burra numbro uno. “Fucking Rad” are the only words that comes to mind when describing the O.G. of Donkey fuckers.
Seriously, this guy was so creepy and bad ass at the same time, I wanted to put him on the payroll. He belongs with us. I’m gonna keep him for as long as he’s willing to stay. Any man who will raw dog a donkey is OK in my book. My gut instinct says you could trust a guy like this.
These guys came to worship The Donkey Fucker. I don’t blame them. If it wasn’t such a common thing in this area of Colombia, I’m sure they would come by the 1000s to get a glimpse of this madness.
Many of you have friends who do dumb shit. Maybe one of them can drink a bucket of beer through his nose or something, and maybe one is a good fighter or can break down a car engine in record time. But nobody holds a candle to a grown man who repeatedly fucks baby donkeys with a smile on his face. I think this is even discussed in the Bible somewhere. Look it up.
As I type this, Kincade sits on the shitter with brown water spewing from both ends. It’s not pretty. Poor guy drank the water or something and is now paying the cost. We had to scrap a shoot last night when it started. About 12 minutes into the scene and he gets up and makes a full sprint to the bathroom where Exorcist style vomiting took place out of both holes. It was epic.
Needless to say, I feel sorry for the fella so I’m going to post a few photos from the shoot a few days ago when we was in better health.
You can’t make stuff like this up and I’m happy to have been able to catch a photo of the elusive Colombian Fedex truck.
This is my warning to Third World Media. When the tapes I send you don’t make it, now you know why.
I’m going to give you the cliff notes on this one because it sickens me to talk about it. Some crazy shit is going on south of the border in the land of coffee and cocaine. Well, the land of coffee, cocaine, weed, raw pussy, guns, guns, more guns and donkey fuckers. Couldn’t get any better, right?
Well, my friend here in Colombia hooked up with another guy who is gay and was (past tense) helping us find some trannys to shoot. Apparently a few days before we meet this dick head he rapes a 13 year old deaf boy at knife point. Then he goes on with his life as if nothing happened.
So the police have been looking for this guy and when someone finally notices him, guess where he just happens to be and who with? Bingo! You can imagine the rest of the story. Ill just say its not a pretty one. I hope they cut this fuckers balls off. You can picture the scene for such a raid and the hell that broke loose when it happened. I’m surprised we all didn’t get shot just for being with the guy.
Gay child molesters, donkey fucking brothers, transsexuals, pornos, drugs… I think I need to change countries before shit really gets out of hand. We’re WAY over the line on this trip. I’m pretty sure one of us won’t even make it back.
You know your going to have a crazy day when your friend wakes you up with, “hey dude, wake up… I just got off the phone with the tranny… we gotta go” and then leaves the room and leaves behind the smell of home grown Colombian sticky. My interest was peaked.
I spent my day riding around in a taxi with my friend, 2 transsexuals and a cab driver who fucks donkeys (“Coma Burra”). Yea, you read that right. Keep reading. See, here in Colombia some people think that if you have sex with a female baby donkey, you will get a large cock when you grow up. Uh-huh. So some country boys here fuck donkeys and our taxi driver just happened to be one of these guys, as is his brother, who we renamed, “Coma Burra dos.” I wish I could make this up but I couldn’t event dream of something so insane.
Hunter Thompson has a quote, “You don’t find acid. Acid finds you when it thinks you’re ready for it.”
Applying that to “crazy situations” I have to believe the same applies. Just swap out the word “acid” for “crazy situations.” You don’t find crazy situations. Crazy situations find you when it thinks you’re ready for one.
OK… where was I? Ah yes… Donkey fuckers.
“Coma Burra” means Donkey Fucker in Spanish. The brothers are from this day to be addressed as “donkey fucker 1″ and “donkey fucker 2.” You can say it in English or Spanish, it doesn’t matter. And why doesn’t it matter? BECAUSE THEY FUCK BABY DONKEYS!!!!! Nothing matters from this point on. In fact, nothing may ever matter again.
DF1 and DF2 are so open about it that it’s creepy, but we are still using them every day as our personal drivers and somehow, in some odd way, there is a bond taking place. Maybe we need D1 and D2 and maybe they need us. Is it possible the universe brought us all together as fate? No fucking idea, I’m high as fuck right now and tripping balls on the fact that these two dudes fuck baby donkeys and I’m going to roll with THEM.
I’ll post pics in a day or two of donkey fucker 1. BTW, donkey fucker 1 is married and STILL likes to fuck the young donkeys. He said baby donkey pussy is better than a real womans pussy. Hmmmmm. Sounds like a trap in the making to me.
So here we are in the barrios where people are riding horses and donkeys around and with me, my Colombian dope smoking friend, two 1/2 dressed transsexuals and a donkey fucker who is wearing a ball hat that says “criminals” on it. We’re driving around on dirt roads in some of the scariest places known to man, looking for girls and trannys to make pornos. Glorious. I have a moment of clarity here and decide at this very moment, the universe is as it should be. We’re going to move forward.
At this stage, all we needed were a few teenage schoolgirls and some hard drugs and we would of been set. Well, one of the trannys had some coke but I don’t touch that shit. Not here, in the middle of the craziest group of people I’ve ever been surrounded by in my life. I’ll pass this time. So then I guess all we needed were some little girls and it would of iced the cake of insanity. Today has been insane my friends. Just insane.